Your Child is a Winner
Your Child is a Winner, as long as he learns and celebrates his failures. aœ
It is the parents who define the word asuccessa to their child, through their reaction. How you respond to your childas attempts in any task will define the word ’successa for him and eventually determine the spirit with which he will lead the rest of his life. If you consider losing in a contest a failure and not a learning ground, then your child is surely going to measure his success in terms of losing and winning. And this is what mostly parents do. Instead of celebrating the attempt of the child, they focus entirely on the outcome. What could be an opportunity to encourage and make the child learn from his mistakes, becomes a session of criticism and disappointment.
Such an attitude of parents disturbs a childas balance. He may develop a fear of failure and may refuse to participate or he may become over ambitious and may not be able to take failures in his stride. Whichever way, this will breed negative feelings .The child will either suffer due to low self esteem or due to inflated ego leading to envy and anger towards people performing better than him.
Success is not about winning, it is all about enjoying and growing with each experience.
So encourage your child to participate regardless of winning or losing. Appreciate his efforts and celebrate the occasion. This will teach him that it is more important to participate than to just win. Help him analyze his shortcomings and improve upon them. This will help him to enjoy whatever he does without undue pressure.
It is important to give your child the courage to accept defeat. Donat ever tell your child that the judgment was unfair or biased. Heall always play the blame game. And worst still, heall never be able to see his own weaknesses and thus never overcome them.
Be a confidence booster for him. Parentas reaction can either make or break a childas confidence. Your encouragement at each step to participate, without the fear of outcome, will eventually help your child discover his hidden qualities, make him confident and infuse in him the zeal to explore and try new things. Thus, widening his horizons and opening a world of possibilities for him.
And why do we forget that each child is unique. Where one child excels in class, the other may be a leader in field. So, donat expect your child to succeed in every task. This will create undue pressure on him, thus marring his natural abilities.
So next time, if your child loses in a tournament, donat think why he didnat win. See how he has tried and look at all the matches heall play in the future. Your expression of disappointment or your criticism will certainly not help him win his next match. On the other, a pat on his back would definitely give him the confidence to make an attempt and do his parents proud.
Tips for Better Parenting
Tips for Better Parenting
No one in this world can rightfully claim that he or she is the perfect parent. Raising a child can be very staggering. It can be especially difficult if you have more than one child to bring up or if you are a single parent. You are bound to make some mistakes in time.
You probably are going to lose your temper over your children’s misbehaviours more than often. These could lead you to hurt your children and say things you do not really mean. Learn from these tips for better parenting then and work hard to become a better parent as much as you can.
Understand why your children are misbehaving. This is the essence of any tips for better parenting. Once you know the reasons why your child goes against the rules, you are closer to becoming the good parent that you want to become. In most cases, children tend to misbehave because they lack your attention. If being good does not earn them your affections, they misbehave so that you get to notice them. To avoid that, spend as much time you can with your children. Play with them, walk with them, read to them, and more.
In other cases, children break the rules because they want to test out the limits imposed on them and the boundaries they have to function within. Any tips for better parenting will advise you that a physical punishment is not the way to deal with things. Instead, discipline your kids through redirecting them. If certain misbehaviour is prohibited, provide a child the behaviour that is accepted. For example, peeing in bed is prohibited. Explain to your child properly that peeing in the bathroom is the right way. You need patience for this because it would probably take time before your kids understand the rules.
Among the many good tips for better parenting is to dole out punishment. You do not do this however by spanking or slapping your kid. You do not also do this by shouting and calling your children bad names. You talk to them instead and make them see the consequences of their actions. If your kid neglects to make up his bed, punish him by not letting him get out of the house until he makes his bed. These days though, the traditional punishment for behaviour such as grounding and removal of toys are becoming less effective. Kids are becoming cleverer.
If this is the case, you have to find out new ways to impose the rules without physical and emotional damage. Always tell your children that you love them and they are important to you. If they behave properly, praise them and treat them out once in a while. If you have followed the above tips for better parenting but still feel angry at your children all the time, you probably need professional help. Talk to parenting counsellors. You can also join groups that aim to become better parents. Go and have a talk with your priest, your pastor, or your doctor.
Understanding Different Parenting Styles
Parenting style plays an important role in how the children grow up and whether they are able to efficiently handle different situations in their lives. Read on to get greater perception on various different parenting styles or ways.
Parenting is a very important responsibility and activity that involves particular behaviors that are designed to work on an individual and group level so as to influence the child outcomes. Specific behaviors of different parenting styles include reading aloud, spanking and these behaviors cannot be looked at in isolation. Any article on parenting styles will indicate that specific behaviors cannot predict the well being of the child and it is determined more by the entire pattern of parenting. Diana Baumrind developed the different parenting styles and these are often accepted and referred to so as to understand the different styles and their impact. Basically the parenting styles are developed so as to understand the ways in which parents try to control or socialize their children. The styles developed by Baumrind also assume that normal parenting is related with issues of control as the main role of the parents in to teach, influence and also control their children. Parenting styles include two important components of parental demandingness and parental responsiveness. Parental responsiveness is also called parental supportiveness and it is an indication of the extent to which parents are able to foster self regulation, individuality and self assertion through support towards the needs of the children. Parental demandingness is an indication of the ability of parents to integrate the children within the family through supervision and the willingness to confront the disobedient child. Depending on the degree of parental responsiveness and demandingness there are four different parenting styles which are:
Indulgent Style
Indulgent parents are also called nondirective or permissive parents. They are less demanding and more responsive. These parents tend to be rather lenient and nontraditional. They do not need mature behavior and allow for certain amount of self regulation and also tend to avoid confrontation. These parents can also be divided in two other types which are democratic parents and non directive parents. Democratic parents are more conscientious, committed towards the child and are lenient.
Authoritarian Style
Authoritarian parents are extremely demanding and not responsive. They are also status and obedience oriented. They expect their demands and orders to be met without any explanation. These parents are often successful in providing structured and well ordered environments that have clearly stated rules. Authoritarian parents can also be divided in two types which include non authoritarian directive parents who are non intrusive and directive. The second type in this parenting style include authoritarian directive and these are completely intrusive.
Authoritative Style
Authoritative parents are also one of the four parenting styles and in this the parents are both responsive and demanding. They monitor their children and impart clear standards as far as the conduct of their children is concerned. They are also assertive but are completely non intrusive and also restrictive. The disciplinary methods they employ are supportive rather than being punitive. They desire their children to be socially responsible, assertive and cooperative as well as self regulated.
Uninvolved Style
This is one of the extreme parenting styles wherein the demandingness and the responsiveness of the parents in rather low. In fact in extreme cases this may involve both a rejection as well as a neglecting.
In determining parenting styles psychological control also plays an important part and in this the emotional development and the psychological development of the child is also considered. Psychological control includes practices such as inducing guilt in the child, withdrawing love and inducing shame. Authoritative parents are more open to interact with the children and make compromises while authoritarian parents expect their children to completely accept their values, goals and judgments. So authoritative parents along with authoritarian parents are high in behavioral control but authoritative parents score low where psychological control is concerned and authoritarian parents score high in the same. Parenting styles are crucial because they determine the well being of the child in areas such as academic performance, social competence and psychosocial development. Children exposed to uninvolved style of parenting often perform poorly socially and on other measures. Children from authoritarian families perform moderately well academically and do not have problematic behavior but have poor social skills and low self esteem and greater depression levels. Children from indulgent homes may be involved in problematic behavior but have higher self esteem and low depression levels.
Why Babies Are Crying Reasons And Solutions
Crying is very important for babies. Because they are so helpless, crying is thenly way they can get their needs met. Babies cry to make sure they survive, so it is important we respond. Going to babies when they cry does not spoil them.Some reasons babies cry are: being hungryr thirsty, being too hotr too cold,needing comfort,not being well,needing a nappy change,needing closeness with you,having pain,being frightenedr lonely.
Babies under 6 months old
Babies do not cry to make you come to them. They are notld enough to remember you when you are not there. They cry because they need something, but they dont know what they need. You can findut what they need by findingut what makes your baby feel better. If you attend to your babys needs when he cries he will learn that the world is a safe and friendly place to be. As he getslder he will cry less.
You can help settle your baby by:
making sure your baby is not hungryr uncomfortable
picking up your baby and holding him close to you if he is frightenedr lonely
holding your baby upright against your shoulder if he is uncomfortable
rockingr pushing the pramver a little bump
findingut what your baby seems to like [some babies are helped by a dummy and some like musicr sounds such as a clock ticking]
watching for what happens when he is more settled and learning to know him and what he needs. See the topic Crying baby for more information.
Babies over 6 months
They may cry from being uncomfortabler hungry,r because they remember you when you are not there and they want you. This is sometimes called separation anxiety. It is normal and a partf their love and trust for you. They slowly learn that you are there for them and you wont leave them for long, so they start to feel safe without you, but this takes time to learn.ften babies at this age will wake at nightr are harder to put to bed because they miss you and they dont yet understand that you always come back.
You can help by:
You always letting your baby know when you leave her. Wave goodbye and let her know when you return
playing little games such as peek-a-boo to help her get used to your going and coming
leaving hernly with people she knows well and feels safe with
if you need to reassure her at night, try putting a bed in her roomr putting her cot in your room so you can get some sleep as well.
How to Talk to Children With Depression
When a child has been diagnosed with depression, it can be difficult to know how to talk to him about his feelings. You may wonder if you should bring it up or whether you should pretend as if everything is normal. Understanding the symptoms of depression and the treatment options can help you relate to your child and ease your own discomfort in talking with him.
1. Symptoms-If your child has been diagnosed with depression, a combination of symptoms have likely occurred that indicated a need for treatment. Depression is expressed differently in children than it is in adults. Although a child may present as sad, she may also show signs of irritability. A depressed or irritable mood that lasts longer than two weeks indicates a problem that should be addressed. Depression is also often accompanied by physical symptoms like headaches and stomachaches, as well as weight fluctuations and disruptions in sleep patterns. Being familiar with these symptoms can help you understand why your child is feeling the way she is and how these symptoms might be affecting her.
2. Treatment-If your child is being treated for depression, he is most likely in therapy and may be on an antidepressant medication.You should familiarize yourself with the medication so you can watch for any potential side effects and also be alert for any changes in your childs mood or behavior. He may be uncomfortable sharing the details of his treatment or any medications, so be prepared to do the research on your own.
3. Isolation-A child who is depressed may want to isolate herself. Gently encouraging your child to participate in activities or offering an ear to listen to whats going on with her can her feel more comfortable and not pressured to act "normal." Giving her individual attention when you notice her withdrawing can be helpful, but try not to single her out. Instead of saying, "Jane, do not stand by yourself," suggest something like, "Jane, would you like to help me over here?" Anything you can do to include your child and keep other kids from singling her out can be beneficial.
4. Normalize-It is helpful to normalize what the your child is feeling. If he shares with you that he feels worthless or isnt good at something, share a similar feeling, such as when you you couldnt shoot a basket or failed a test. Relating to your child encourages him to talk to you and reduces the likelihood that he will feel judged.
5. Professional Help-If you are concerned your child might hurt herself or have any concern for her safety, tell her that you are concerned. Ask her if she has harmful thoughts. If she indicates that she may be in danger, seek professional help immediately.
Top 10 Tips For Good Parenting
Parenting is a very evolving experience. Once a parent, we can actually feel ourselves looking at the world with a different perspective. Our ideals and dreams seem to be changing and we want the very best for our children. Children are adorable with their innocence and adaptive nature but we must also regard them as individuals. Our passion for ethnic handicrafts must be in total contrast to their penchant for Chinese tattoos and this is an area for compromise and understanding.
1. Patience is the most important ingredient for parenting. I feel this is a cultivated skill and once practiced regularly it becomes habitual. This also becomes infectious as there are fewer arguments at home.
2. Assertive means not aggressive but firm in ideals. Making a point clear is important. A toddler needs to understand that this cartoon is not good for watching just as the teenager needs to observe time lines with night-outs.
3..Making time is the only option all of us have. Make time and enjoy parenting. Schedule time for students sports, charity, mud play, lazy Sundays, serious math homework and brunch cooking. Plan simple getaways or a trip to visit your ma-in-law.
4. Honesty is one virtue that is getting rare. Kids emulate us and often notice our failures. Keep up the promise you made even you have to slog extra man hours at work or chores at home on a Friday night if you need to take the kids to the water park on Saturday morning.
5. Realistic people are firm in their practical approach. Constantly cribbing about recession or mundane chores will make kids realize that something is not okay. If you need to talk to someone then do it close doors and far away from children who are extremely influenced by negative talk.
6. Gratitude is the only thing that is a saving grace. Thank God for such lovely children and the opportunity to work hard. Believe that good times will come and the bad days will pass just like the cold flu.
7. Youthfulness is about the mind. Stay young for yourself. Groom well and look nice. Take care of the ailing foot and stay fit with diet and exercise. Kids adore these qualities.
8. Express and do not sulk. If your teenage daughter has an outrageous fashion sense then be open about it. Talk to her and sit her down. Bottling things inside will result in cold war.
9. Learning to cook a new meal or to do a math sum is not really tough if you wish to try hard. Life is full to a person who wants to learn. Kids also learn to be self reliant like their parents.
10. Value money and opportunity. Easy money for kids will make them succumb to vanity. If the skating gear at the wholesale shop is cheaper then An imported gear can be invested for a special championship.
Parenting Skills for Children
Parenting skills are essential to the healthy development of children. While most questions about different aspects of child-rearing do not have absolute right and wrong answers, there are basic guidelines about how parenting skills are best applied. By nurturing, teaching and disciplining your children, you provide them with the self-confidence, character and abilities they need to be as successful as possible in all aspects of their lives.
Nurturing
A childs sense of self-worth and confidence must be nurtured through childhood. Parents must make children feel safe and loved unconditionally. Physical contact is just as important as expressing love verbally. By giving children a great deal of undivided attention, you convey to them they are loved and worth your time, points out the Baby Center website.
Teaching
The ability to teach children with effective communication is a crucial parenting skill. Parents impart knowledge, but they also instill a sense of right and wrong and a moral code. They must instruct children in what is expected of them. While much of this is a gradual process, its important to clearly and consistently communicate behavioral expectations from the start, explains the AllPsych Journal website.
Remember that your actions are as important as your words when communicating with children, and what you do should always be in sync with what you tell children. As the AllPsych Journal website explains, this prevents confusion on the part of children, and it contributes to your being seen as respectable, an authority figure and a role model.
Discipline
Discipline, via both positive and negative reinforcement, is an absolute necessity when raising children. Discipline begins at the earliest stages with routine. The ability to create and stick to healthy routines is an important parenting skill. Children are made to feel safe and are trained to do the things they must do with repetition and familiarity, explains the Keep Kids Healthy website. Routine also builds confidence in children, notes Dr. Peter Gorski, an assistant professor of pediatrics at Harvard Medical School.
The best methods of discipline are subjective and widely-disputed. There is one guiding principle for discipline that is indisputable, though. It is only effective when it is administered consistently, as the AllPsych Journal website points out. The Royal College of Psychiatrists reminds you to be realistic about what you will do, both as reward or as punishment, when disciplining your child. Follow-through is a key part of consistency and maintaining your authority.
The Communication Gap Between Parents and Teenagers
Why do parents have such a difficult time to communicate openly and honestly with their teens? Why cant teens just talk about whatever they need to with their parents? Why is there such a communication gap between parents and teenagers?
There are many reasons why teens and parents cannot communicate effectively. Most of the reasons stem from not being able to properly understand their teens. This can lead to a lot of problems in future when the teenager needs to talk to a parent and she cant do so.
This points to a typical, albeit dangerous, gap between a parents experiences and attitudes and their teens. It is a dangerous gap because parents will have to communicate with their teens at some point during the most important and informative years of their lives.
Thus, parents must figure out how to communicate openly and honestly with their teens about a wide variety of issues, some of which may be personal and may make them feel vulnerable.
Here are a few tips to make communication easier between parents and teenagers.
1. Try not to talk down to your teens. Make them feel as if their views and opinions really count and that they matter. This will not only facilitate your discussions with your teen but bring your closer to him as well.
2. Imagine what it would be like to be a teen. Try to remember some of the negative feelings and uncertainties that you experienced as a teenager and apply it to your teens situation.
3. Be empathic about your teens predicament at all times. Never be condescending or make negative remarks to your teen about what she has said or done.
4. Remember how much courage it would have taken for your teen to come and talk to you about something that is very personal to him. Reward your teen by listening emphatically and respectfully.
5. Dont ignore your teens feelings and emotions because it is usually a cry for help. For instance, if your teen is unusually angry or touchy, it may be time to spend a bit of quality time with your teen to determine what is wrong and where he is coming from.
It is, therefore, essential for parents to strive to keep lines of communication open at all times with their teens. Try to remember what it was like to be a teenager and how vulnerable you felt. Try to remember how uncertain you felt at all times. And try to remember how awful you felt when you were misunderstood by your own parents. Then you will be well on your way to help your teen to communicate more openly and honestly.
Choosing a Baby Sitter
Parents are particularly scrupulous when looking for daytime child care arrangements. But should you be any less careful when hiring a baby sitter for a one-night booking It is equally important to make the right choice when hiring a nighttime sitter.
The Search Is on
Dont assume that a relative or family friend is any better than a sitter for hire the most important qualifications for a sitter are maturity and responsibility. Here three sources for finding people that meet these qualifications
1. Get Personal Referrals
The best referrals come from dependable sources. Inquire among people you trust: ask how they found the baby sitter if they were comfortable with the arrangement if they would ask the sitter back again and what they paid. Places to consider when sleuthing for names are your pediatricians office churches and your childs school.
2. Conduct a Self Search
A second option is to advertise. Consider a local paper or community or college bulletin boards. The New York City based Child Care Action Campaign CCAC recommends that your ad give the following information your childs age the hours during which you need child care the professional qualifications you require such as certification in CPR and the benefits that you as an employer will offer such as gas money to get to and from your house or free meals while on the job.
3. Contact an Agency
The CCAC offers a handy guide on choosing the right child care. You can also try the Yellow Pages looking under child care. Some local agencies such as the American Red CrossYWCA and Girls Inc. offer baby sitting training courses and job referral programs for prospective sitters.
Interview with a Sitter
Once you have the names of prospective baby sitters set up interviews to meet with them to determine their maturity level and to just get a feel for each person. Bruce Hirschfield Director of the Child Welfare League of America CWLA notes that maturity not age is the deciding factor. You can have a fourteen year old with a great deal of maturity and a twenty two year old without much maturity says Hirschfield. It really goes case by case. You must feel comfortable with the baby sitter.
Checking Background
Whether you do this before or after the interview its critical that you check to see how much baby sitting experience a candidate has. Some baby sitters may have completed training courses others might have experience with their own brothers and sisters. Check the sitters references before hiring. Ask past employers if the person is dependable what age children were cared for and how children got along with the baby sitter.
If you have an infant confirm that the candidate knows the proper procedures for feeding or burping bathing sleeping and playing. Because there are different qualifications needed to care for a 6 month old versus a 6 year old make sure to address age specific issues.
How To Become a Great Parent
So you want to become a great parent?
Simplicity is the best choice for becoming a great parent. My children love to learn from me and they feel proud of what I know. I simply encourage them to do simple things that really matter and this could also gain the self-confidence of the child.
Here are 5 simple parenting tips which I love to share with you… and it is this:
1. Encourage your children to meet new friends especially in their kindergarten. It is so grateful to see how open your child is to meeting someone new. It is a great way to increase their communication skills and become sociable.
2. Teach your child that a genuine SMILEcan get them anywhere in life.
3. A great parenting skill is to understand how the mind of the child works and integrating some of this simplistic fun in your own life. Children love to play and they know very well how to entertain themselves. Parents should try to understand their enjoyment and in addition need to enjoy with them.
4. Try more new things in order to improve your parenting skills and let your children know that they could do the same thing as you do. Parents should allow their children to try more different activities such as basketball pianos dancing and etc. This is a way that children could experience what they really enjoy and what they are good at.
5. Teach your children to love learning. Children are curious in many new things and it is great to have them explore new activity into a learning pattern. Parents could bring their children to the library or museum to pick their new books or learn other educational stuffs that makes them feel fun of.
Weekly Parenting Tips Let Kids be Kids
Sometimes it amazes me the demands that are placed on children these days. While as parents we can all say that we had it “harder†then our kids do now because we had to be creative and play with our imagination where as now there are video games and computers. Let’s face it the pressure that is put on our children today to grow up fast is really out of control.
We have them in multiple sports we push them to join different clubs their peers put pressure on them to look more grown up and dress more grown up and the media encourages this. Take a look at the toys we want our little girls to play with Bratz and Barbie… or have a look at the style of clothes that are available do those toys look innocent to you?
Life passes us by quick enough as it is. Let your child be a child regardless of how old they are. To help make sure your child isn’t robbed of their youth here are several tips you can follow one for each day of the week to think about.
Mondays Parenting Tip: Set limits but be realistic!
It seems to me that there are three types of parents. Those that have no limitations on their kids those that have way too many limitations on their kids and then the happy medium bunch who have realistic limitations. With that being said before you jump up and say that is the way I parent let me explain. The “no limit†parents are those that think they are doing a favor to their children by letting them be free spirits and they do no t impose restrictions such as bed time manners politeness and so on. Then there are parents who do not let their children do anything. No running jumping screaming yelling playing loudly… the children are to be seen and not heard and when they are seen they are to be neat tidy and orderly. That my friend is closer to being an adult then it is to being a child.
Set limitations children need limitations to learn what is acceptable and what isn’t. They also need to be free enough to explore and grow as individuals. So if your three year old wants to run naked through the house with a cap on and pretend he or she is a superhero let them. The phase won’t last… and it would be shame for you to miss it.
Tuesdays Parenting Tip: Take an Active Part in Your Child’s Life
This tip actually came from my kids as we sat around and talked about this piece. When you play with them you are encouraging them to play. You are also showing them that it is important to take time out of your busy day regardless of the demands that are there to play.
Wednesdays Parenting Tip: Listen When They Speak
If you really want your child to be a child then listen to them when they talk. You may be asking how this helps your child stay a child. I am going to tell you. It shows them that there is value to what they have to say. That you value them and what they are saying even if they are 3 10 13 16 or 18. You want your children to talk to you because you don’t want them seeking out other ways to express themselves that will rob them of their childhood. Trust me if you don’t listen to them when they are trying to talk to you they will find a way for you to take notice or have someone else take notice of them… and that is a path you don’t want them to take.
Thursdays Parenting Tip: Be Positive When You Talk to Your Kids
Our world has enough negativity in it already that our children do not need to get it from us. So if there is a toy or a gift that they want because all of their friends have it explain to them in a positive fashion why they don’t need it. When they do something wrong try to talk to them intelligently about why it was wrong. If you don’t want them to do it again they need to understand why it was wrong.
Fridays Parenting Tip: Give Your Kids a Chance to Show Their Interests
So you like to golf or shop or go tanning and you think that your children like those things also. Have you ever asked your children what they enjoy? Or better yet have you listen to them when they were talking to hear what really interests them. For example we found out that our son really was interested in fishing because he would get up early and watch the fishing shows before we would get up and then at breakfast he would tell us all about it. He never once told us that he wanted to learn to fish or that he liked fishing. But he talked about and he would get excited about it and he was fascinated by it. We paid attention and he got a pole and his dad ordered him lures and he taught himself to fish at the pond based on what he watched on television.
Saturdays Parenting Tip: Parent Your Children Don’t Delegate to Your Children
This is a biggie! My parents were guilty of this and so were my husband’s parents. And we have done everything possible to not do this to our kids. You are the parent they are the child… do not put your responsibilities on them. It is not the responsibility of your child to clean the whole house to worry about paying the bills to take care of others in the house. Yes they can help yes they should be responsible for their rooms and their things… but it ends there. I remember not being allowed to eat dinner until I feed my younger sister and brother. I was 6 years old.
Sundays Parenting Tip: You Had Your Childhood Let Them Have Theirs
Do not live vicariously through your children. Let them have their childhood. It doesn’t matter what you would‘ve done at their age or what you did at their age. Your time has passed let them enjoy theirs and sit back and enjoy it with them.
http://www.sharingsofwomen.com/baby-care-child-development/1759-weekly-parenting-tips-let-kids-kids.html
How To Develop Good Manners And Courtesy In Children
The environment of the home where the children are forming their character should be of the right kind. If good manners are taught and practised then to do the proper things will be spontaneous. Here we can see how parents can develop such good manners and courtesy in children for which children should know the importance of being polite quiet and so on.
Role of parents
Be example to the child. People enjoy being with a courteous person while they have a hard time to keep from disliking one who is rude. Yet the majority of parents are neglectful in teaching good manners. In some cases they even regard the teaching and practice of etiquette as cultivating a weakness or think that it is affectation. But if we wish to have an influence for good over people we must be polite. It is as important to be polite in dealing with children as with anyone else. Example has more weight than words. So be an ideal parent and be a right example to the child. It exercises a powerful influence on children.
Politeness
Politeness may be so embedded in the child that it will be the only natural course to follow. By percept and example cultivate it as a good habit. Parents have to behave politely and children follow as how their parents are. Parents must be what they wish their children to become. But they must do more-they must also give definite training. It is a case of percept and example going together.
Try not to irritate
Everyone wishes to be strong and to wield an influence for good. To accomplish this we must not do anything that to others is offensive. Righteousness is far more important in life than the rules of etiquette.
The child is not born polite. If he is to be polite he must be taught to be so. It is not at all necessary that he should be taught everything included in books on etiquette. Teach the most important things to the child first and let the rest be secondary.
As child grows
When child gets little older to read everything give books that will be of value to him. Help the child to become true person. If parents wish to associate with people of refinement they must be refined.
Learning to be quiet
We all know how refined people are at public places. They are really quiet in their speech. Wherever the children are let it be shop museum street or market they should be quiet. People decide what we are by the way we act in public places and by the clothing we wear and the way it is put on.
Boys so often go along the city streets dodging in and out and here and there shouting to people they know and sometimes to the people they do not know and at other times shouting just to make noise. Girls talk in loud tones and giggle as they go particularly those girls of age 12 to 18.They show the need that should have been met when they were very little girls. Some of them attract attention to themselves because they want it but others do it ignorantly and thoughtlessly.
Training a girl
A girl should be quiet dress modestly and go about in a businesslike way giving no attention whatever to any except to those to whom she has been introduced by those who have her welfare at heart and with whom she has definite acquaintance.
It would go without saying that no girl who has been properly trained and who has self respect will drink a drop of beer wine or liquor or make any use of cigarettes.
For a boy
What is wholesome for a girl is likewise wholesome for a boy. We should be clean and surely the liquor or tobacco user is not clean.
Action are to be well-timed
There are times to laugh and times to weep and it is very unfortunate if these become transposed. It is nothing short of cruelty to laugh at the misfortunes of others. Never laugh at the physical eccentricities of others. Make it your business to be on time wherever we go.
Thus grow your child to a good citizen.
Parenting Children Kids Tips and Advices
One of the biggest jobs for a person to ever face in life is rising up a child. Many parents are facing problems related to parenting. The main reasons for them to face problems related to child parenting are lack of support, knowledge and maturity. The result is the child becomes a danger in the society. A number of organizations have started educating the parents on parenting.
They conduct special programs on parenting. Many parents have gained more knowledge about parenting after attending these classes and also they have shown tremendous positive effects. Some experts in parental education say nurturing also plays a vital role in parenting. It says the parents need to be nurtured as they learn to nurture their children. Parents are best teachers. So parents need to strict like teachers to their children’s in certain aspects.
Developing a powerful parent teacher connection is an essential element in building the strongest bond to success. This makes the children’s to think before they do something wrong. Teach your child the value of money. It is very important for them to set up their life. Try to remove the homework fear from your kids. Too many kids skip breakfast. Not only does this impact their grades, but, more importantly their health. Tell them the importance of breakfast.
Lets talk about branding your new self as the most recent Mum-to-be. You donand#39:t want to be a frumpy mums with constant backpains. These maternity bags are so popular due to their design and practical uses for new mums. There are so many useful pockets and they come in a variety of styles.
Behavior is influenced by two major factors: heredity and learning
If you have a child is out of control, then a good children behavior management program will be helpful. Start telling stories to your children’s. Stories can entertain and amuse as well as educate and motivate them.
Genetics does not provide an adequate explanation for specific behavior. Children do inherit physical traits and a certain biochemical make-up, which may help or hinder them in various activities. All of these forces, however, interact with what the child learns from life experiences.
Inherited physical structure increases the chances for various types of behavior. For example, a child who has inherited a strong and sturdy body is more likely to be involved in and successful at sports. .A youngster who is attractive is more likely to be outgoing and involved socially. The child who inherits a highly developed brain has the potential to excel in intellectual activities.
The point is we donand#39:t inherit behavior! What we do inherit is a broad potential to behave in a million different ways. We donand#39:t inherit had temper, stubbornness, laziness, or violence and aggressiveness. Nor, on the positive side, do we inherit industriousness, friendliness, leadership, courage, or honesty. All of these characteristics and values [often assumed to be characteristics of different social or national groups] are the result of different learning experiences, rather than heredity.
Learning to share your toys is a hard lesson, and itand#39:s a rare young child who willingly gives up prized possessions to let another use them, even for a few minutes. Even very young children see that the expression of anger sometimes achieves goals.
For parents, the fact that behavior is determined by learning is actually a great blessing. If all behavior was inherited, we would be stuck with a trait like the and#39:Oand#39:Grady temperand#39:, and never would be able to change it! No parent can change a childand#39:s genetic structure. Parents can and do have a tremendous effect upon their children through learning. [We donand#39:t want to give the impression that parents exclusively determine a childand#39:s behavior, however. All sorts of people are involved.
Ten principles of good parenting
1. What you do matters. Whether it s your own health behaviors or the way you treat other people your children are learning from what you do. This is one of the most important principles Steinberg explains. What you do makes a difference...Don t just react on the spur of the moment. Ask yourself What do I want to accomplish and is this likely to produce that result?
2. You cannot be too loving. It is simply not possible to spoil a child with love Steinberg writes. What we often think of as the product of spoiling a child is never the result of showing a child too much love. It is usually the consequence of giving a child things in place of love -- things like leniency lowered expectations or material possessions.
3. Be involved in your child s life. Being an involved parent takes time and is hard work and it often means rethinking and rearranging your priorities. It frequently means sacrificing what you want to do for what your child needs to do. Be there mentally as well as physically.
Being involved does not mean doing a child s homework -- or correcting it. Homework is a tool for teachers to know whether the child is learning or not Steinberg says. If you do the homework you re not letting the teacher know what the child is learning.
4. Adapt your parenting to fit your child. Keep pace with your child s development. Your child is growing up. Consider how age is affecting the child s behavior.
The same drive for independence that is making your 3-year-old say no all the time is what s motivating him to be toilet trained writes Steinberg. The same intellectual growth spurt that is making your 13-year-old curious and inquisitive in the classroom also is making her argumentative at the dinner table.
5. Establish and set rules. If you don t manage your child s behavior when he is young he will have a hard time learning how to manage himself when he is older and you aren t around. Any time of the day or night you should always be able to answer these three questions: Where is my child? Who is with my child? What is my child doing? The rules your child has learned from you are going to shape the rules he applies to himself.
But you can t micromanage your child Steinberg notes. Once they re in middle school you need to let the child do their own homework make their own choices and not intervene.
6. Foster your child s independence. Setting limits helps your child develop a sense of self-control. Encouraging independence helps her develop a sense of self-direction. To be successful in life she s going to need both.
It s normal for children to push for autonomy says Steinberg. Many parents mistakenly equate their child s independence with rebelliousness or disobedience. Children push for independence because it is part of human nature to want to feel in control rather than to feel controlled by someone else.
7. Be consistent. If your rules vary from day to day in an unpredictable fashion or if you enforce them only intermittently your child s misbehavior is your fault not his. Your most important disciplinary tool is consistency. Identify your non-negotiables. The more your authority is based on wisdom and not on power the less your child will challenge it.
8. Avoid harsh discipline. Parents should never hit a child under any circumstances Steinberg says. Children who are spanked hit or slapped are more prone to fighting with other children he writes. They are more likely to be bullies and more likely to use aggression to solve disputes with others.
There are many other ways to discipline a child -- including time out -- which work better and do not involve aggression.
9. Explain your rules and decisions. Good parents have expectations they want their child to live up to he writes. Generally parents overexplain to young children and underexplain to adolescents. What is obvious to you may not be evident to a 12-year-old. He doesn t have the priorities judgment or experience that you have.
10. Treat your child with respect. The best way to get respectful treatment from your child is to treat him respectfully Steinberg writes. You should give your child the same courtesies you would give to anyone else. Speak to him politely. Respect his opinion. Pay attention when he is speaking to you. Treat him kindly. Try to please him when you can. Children treat others the way their parents treat them. Your relationship with your child is the foundation for her relationships with others.
Guidelines For Parenting
Good communication is an important parenting skill. Parenting can be more enjoyable when positive parent-child relationship is established.Whether you are parenting a toddler or a teenager, good communication is the key to building self-esteem as well a mutual respect.
Basic Principles of Good Parent/Child Communication
1. Let the child know that you are interested and involved and that you will help when needed.
2. Turn off the television or put the newspaper down when your child wants to converse.
3. Avoid taking a telephone call when the child has something important to tell you.
4. Unless other people are specifically meant to be included, hold conversations in privacy. The best communication between you and the child will occur when others are not around.
5. Embarrassing the child or putting him on the spot in front of others will lead only to resentment and hostility, not good communication.
6. Listen carefully and politely.Be as courteous to your child as you would be to your best friend.
7. Assist the child in planning some specific steps to the solution.
8. Show that you accept the child himself, regardless of what he has or has not done.
9. Reinforce the child for keeping communication open. Do this by accepting him and praising his efforts to communicate.
Yoga for Kids
yoga can help counter the stress experienced by young people living in a hurry-up world.
Our children live in a hurry-up world of busy parents, school pressures, incessant lessons, video games, malls, and competitive sports. We usually dont think of these influences as stressful for our kids, but often they are. The bustling pace of our childrens lives can have a profound effect on their innate joy and usually not for the better.
yoga can help counter these pressures. When children learn techniques for self-health, relaxation, and inner fulfillment, they can navigate lifes challenges with a little more ease. Yoga at an early age encourages self-esteem and body awareness with a physical activity thats noncompetitive. Fostering cooperation and compassion instead of opposition is a great gift to give our children.
Children derive enormous benefits from yoga. Physically, it enhances their flexibility, strength, coordination, and body awareness. In addition, their concentration and sense of calmness and relaxation improves. Doing yoga, children exercise, play, connect more deeply with the inner self, and develop an intimate relationship with the natural world that surrounds them. Yoga brings that marvelous inner light that all children have to the surface.
How to be Friend As Well as Parent
Many parents are unable to balance being a parent as well as a friend. Parents fluctuate between extreme friendliness and sternness. Being a parent and a friend means sharing, paying attention, talking, trusting and encouraging, and also being commanding when needed and inculcating good values to children.
We are in charge of the kid’s emotional and physical wants. Things change as they grow up, as it becomes a relation among equals. So effort is required to maintain a healthy relation.
There should be a right balance between the fixed rules and flexibility. Children should have a steady and routine daily life. This helps them to have better control and feel safe. It is the duty of the parents to inculcate such discipline.
Rules should be imposed softly but resolutely. As kids grow, parents should modify rules and be open to give and take. Parents should be unswerving; kids are intelligent, and they know how to take advantage when parents have a fight.
Communication must be open; kids should be able to talk about everything with their parents. It is a vital ingredient of friendly parenting. Children must be able to trust parents and share issues and should believe parents are always there for them.
Dividing work and working together is a good way to spend quality time and also helps bonding. Strong attachment helps to balance parent-friend approach. Societal exposure is necessary for the overall development of the child.
Bonding with your baby
A baby is born and he/she changes the way things are for his/her parents! The bond between a baby and his/her parents is indeed special. This bonding does not happen instantaneously though.
It happens immediately, right after birth for some. Though for most mothers and fathers the process takes a while. It is not necessarily a primal feeling.
Where the baby is breastfeed soon after birth, the mother develops a quicker bond. In most other cases, the feeling develops over time. It increases with direct skin-to-skin contact. It occurs with hugs, cuddling, and with speaking to the child and making eye contact. All these social interactions lead to bonding.
More often than not, bonding is not instantaneous because the mother is just recovering from labor and delivery. She is likely to be tired, exhausted, and worn out.
It can also happen when the mother has had surgery and is recovering from it and the effects of anesthesia. It could be because of post partum depression.
It may also be because of the baby being separated from his/her parents due to some neonatal care that is required. Thus being swamped with emotions, bonding may take days, week, and even months. Adoption can also be a cause for delayed bonding.
Not bonding immediately with the baby does not make you any less of a parent than others who are quick to bond. It is unique for all people involved.
Bonding is described as an attachment for the baby. A well-bonded child feels loved, secure, and confident. Bonding therefore affects the physical and emotional well being of a child.
Studies show that babies are attuned to their parent’s voices while in the womb and are likely to bond more quickly to his/her parents than others. Bonding can be gradually developed with increasing the communication with the child, having contact that is more direct. Verbal exchanges and eye-to-eye contact can greatly help in bonding.
introverted children
Children's irritating behaviour may give message about child's self regard. In this time you must listen to them severely, understand each other and then tell them what you make your point. For example, when your child says:"I'm so stupid, I can not make right anything." you should answer as "I know you think like that, but I am not agree with you. You need time to learn something, I know that you are talented. Remember how you repair your toy car. Everyone can not do that." Whatever the child gives reaction, the child should be induced on their talent.
Sleepwetting
My little girl is five years old. And she has been wetting her bed. Previously she had not this habituation. she had not done like that. I need an advice for that problem.
Firstly you should understand the problem, After that you can solve the problem. You should observe your child. You could awake your child at certain times of nights for asking her the call of nature. Also you should check what your child is watching. Before she sleeps you could tell a funny stories. Because psychological problem your child has this problem. Your child needs to know that you give her a back. if the problem goes on in despite of all your pursuits you should go to a doctor.
http://www.sharingsofwomen.com/baby-care-child-development/1749-sleepwetting.html
About sleeping!
Well what can I say a new born baby off a week old can't even make me sleep. Everyone keeps telling me I should sleep when my little girl is, but I can sleep at all. Can someone help me almost 3 days with no sleep? Is it good for the body?
Do take care over this one. If this continues go to your doctor and ask for help. What I would suggest is you try and work out a routine for yourself in the evening to help yourself wind down and relax. A warm bath, soothing music, lavender oil, anything which appeals to you, use it. Yoga can help too. I think nature can be a bit cruel sometimes, just when you need rest, you find something to do or think about. Concentrate on the most important things, and leave the rest for later.
http://www.sharingsofwomen.com/baby-care-child-development/1742-about-sleeping.html
How do you treat to your stubborn children?
1-when s/he resists to you, be not stubborn. do not forget that you are a adult and s/he is a child.
2-Remember that this way of behaviour is feature of the age and growing.
3-do not treat your children such as anger, prevention, shouting, punishing for behavioral change. otherwise, S/he is out keeping with you.
4-Do not explain so much for un-solicited status. do not wait to understand you, do not again the same behaviour. as s/he grows they understand you.
5-in un-solicited status divert him/her by using games. Their attention span is so short. if you are creativity, you may be able to cause the child to lose concentration.
6-if games are useless do not cut the painter and cange your job. after a while you will see that the children calm down.
Do not identify your child as a misfit, poorly trained or problem child. after three age s/he is in evolution scale to understand you and attuned to your rules. you know that your child's development provess very well. Because some time a normal behaviour colud be utilized as a problem.
for not brushing up against baby gas problem
As soon as the baby come into the world, before the breasfeed, make the baby drink one teaspoon pomegranate juice.
You're right. I experienced and I did not brushing up against baby gas problem.
http://www.sharingsofwomen.com/baby-care-child-development/1729-not-brushing-up-against-baby-gas-problem.html
Twins care
It's natural that a pregnant women's fear when she hears twins are coming whereas she waits one child. Because the plans for just one just are changed for two babies.
it's known how a baby exhausts his/her mother. whereas two babies how gives the mother hard time. it will be hard to breastfeed two babies. if you breastfeed two babies at the same time you may save your time. take on them your lap as legs-out. one breast for one baby and the other one for another baby. even though it is difficult for you, you can breast them one by one.
Then, bathing the twins at the same time... for this you should bath with them, but it takes your time so much. So, you may bath them one by one. Their bedtime is appropriate for you.
When your husband is at home make available to help you. He must learn to take responsibility. But, you should take attention to your husband for not dealing with just the same baby always. otherwise, the other baby might stand cleaf of his/her father.
For saving your time you could do your private jobs when the twins are sleeping or you sleep at the same time with your twins. You can arrange your time like that.
whereas it sees as twins are so naughty and they will not get on well with themselves, in time you will see that they are fraternize with each other. So that do not forget these bas times are going to end one day.
Contact with other parents who have twins and pick their brain. In this way it will be useful for you.
My little girl's tongue
Hello, My little girl, 2 years old, is begining to stammer. whereas she had been speaking fluently. before 15 days she fell down suddenly and she broke her arm. i think she was afraid. everythings returned normal right now, but my little girl can not speak yet.
i was reading a book yesterday which is related with that problem. it says the children, 2 years old, incubate what they will say. and when they begin to speak quickly they get a rush. so, they stammer. this case is possible for the children in these ages. just observe her, if it continuesin older ages, you may go to a doctor.
http://www.sharingsofwomen.com/baby-care-child-development/1627-my-little-girls-tongue.html
My baby dosn't sleep :(
Previously my baby has been sleeping lonely. last months as soon as he realize the sleeping time has came, he behaves like not need to sleep. dont wanna be sleep. i wait with him to sleep for about two hours. I am working mother and i feel so tired. i spend all my time with him, i give all my love to him. but i am so sad when i see him like that. Anybody who have same problem? What should i do?
if you go to work in the mornings before he wake up, he doesnt wanna sleep so that he can not see you.
http://www.sharingsofwomen.com/baby-care-child-development/1623-my-baby-dosnt-sleep.html
I can't get my son to eat solids.
My son is almost 17 months old. He eats mostly baby food. He will eat crackers, cookies and little puffs. We're just starting to get him to eat canned veggies and fruits. However, we've just been having so much trouble getting him to drink from his sippy cup, eat the canned fruits and veggies and eat meat.
Does anyone have any suggestions/input? Any recipes? Any ideas on how to get him totally off of baby food? Thanks!
At 17 months old. He is too old for baby food. Stop giving it to him. He should be able to eat what you eat just make sure you cut it up very small. He will eat and will not starve himself.
You can try some Gerber graduates if you have no idea but he can eat what you are eating.
Believe me, I totally understand. My son is 24 months old and has absolutely no interest what so ever in solid foods. When he was about 1 1/2, I tried giving him a sliver of mashed potatoes and he threw up. Granted he hadn't ate anything else just before that so it was mostly stomach acid that he lost. I think that it is a texture issue with my son. We've tried other foods with him but he's just not going to eat it. (My son is very strong willed.) I have talked with the doctor and he tells me that as long as you continue to offer the baby food, he will only want baby food. He said that you can try to incorporate the solids in with the baby food or just drop the baby food altogether. (I tried mixing solids in with the baby food only to have him quit eating it for that sitting.) If you do drop it, he may not eat for 2 or 3 days, however, in my son's case, he is in great health and his weight is appropriate so the doc says not to worry. YOU HAVE TO BE FIRM. I am on the way to completely stopping the baby food. We have almost ran out and he has made me waste more baby food than he's eating lately. He only wants bananas. Go figure!!! Anyway, as far as the sippy cups, I had the worst time with that also. Come to find out that a cup with a straw in it was the way to go. Save your money the doc says...it's only a marketing scheme. Hang in there, I know it's tough. This is my first son and I only want the best for him as I'm positive you only want the best for your son also. I hope some of this has helped not only you, but others that are in the same boat. Be sure if you have any questions, contact your doctor.
http://www.sharingsofwomen.com/baby-care-child-development/7-i-cant-get-my-son-eat-solids.html
